Oral Sex Isn't For Me, but the Womanizer Next Changed My Mind

I hate getting head. That's probably not a sentence you've heard often, but it's true. For many women, receiving oral sex is the holy grail of turn-ons, whether it's part of foreplay or the main event. Most people will say, "Well, maybe you just haven't gotten good head." But I experimented plenty before meeting my husband, and no matter how skilled the giver, it just wasn't something I enjoyed, let alone orgasmed from.

There's no shortage of songs from my favorite female artists (Megan Thee Stallion, love you, but I'm looking at you) who left me feeling inadequate as a woman when it came to how I perceived pleasure. Was something wrong with me? Was I not fully claiming earth-shattering orgasms from oral as my birthright? The reality is, there's no normal when it comes to sexual pleasure. Anatomy, preferences, and sensations are unique to every person with a vulva.

As a neurodivergent person, I deal with sensory problems and misophonia. I can't stand the sound of audible chewing, repetitive yawning, constant sniffling, or loud breathing, which all trigger me. The same goes for tactile scenarios: while I enjoy clitoral pressure with vibrators and fingers, I dislike the feeling of excessive wetness and certain sensations of a tongue down there.

On a quest for something that could provide a unique alternative to oral, I came across the Womanizer Next Clitoral Stimulator ($219), which offers indirect clitoral stimulation and a similar sensation. I was skeptical but intrigued.

Womanizer Next Clitoral Stimulator

From

$219

$219 at Amazon

Carol Queen, PhD, an in-house sexologist for Good Vibes, says, "A person using a toy will be able to control elements of the sensory experience more easily than a partner can, because they are 'inside the sensation.'" Dr. Queen adds, "A partner can respond to feedback, of course, but inside our own sensory experience we are able to change elements pretty much immediately."

When my toy arrived in the mail, I immediately canceled all my plans, whipped out my favorite CBD lube, and got to playing.

Appearance: From ultra-feminine to gender-neutral, there are great clit suckers in a range of colors and shapes, including discreet options like the viral rose. Additionally, certain toys in this genre will have a tongue attachment to "lick," but if you dislike direct clit stimulation, it's best to stick with air-based tech.

Sound: Is discretion your priority? If you have thin walls or live with parents, roommates, or kids, you'll want a toy with a quieter motor. Sometimes, these toys are pricier, but generally, clitoral stimulators are quieter than something like the Magic Wand.

Features: Some of these toys will have features for different desires. Waterproof toys allow for fun in a pool, bath, or shower and are easier to clean. Some toys only have a few settings, while others have over 20 patterns and intensities. Some have the option of adding vibrations, while others only provide suction.

Size: Some stimulators are small, while others are bigger. If you want to use this during sex or with a dildo, smaller may be better, but be harder to hold. If you want penetration along with sucking, there are rabbit-style suckers out there, but they're generally larger.

The Womanizer Next feels pleasantly weighty without being bulky. The design is ergonomic, and the weight and shape even allow me to hold it between my legs for hands-free fun.

While discretion wasn't my main concern, I don't love the sounds of oral sex, and the Next was exceptionally quiet. It has a Smart Silence feature that was so effective, my hubby didn't hear it when I was next to him in bed. Plus, it automatically turns off when it's not in contact with your skin.

The toy latched onto my clit with a touch of lube for better suction, and the autopilot setting, located on the device's interior base, was the closest thing to oral sex (minus the ick sensations) that I've ever felt. The unpredictable vibe and suction patterns guide you on an adventure based on your preferences. The 360-degree sensation feels like gentle but intense sucking and pairs great with penetration. A note that this setting starts off slow, so patience is key.

Most clit suckers start off a bit too percussive for me, and as someone with a sensitive body, I prefer a gentler start than shallow, aggressive drumming on my clit. The innovative 3D Pleasure Air Technology provides slower pulsations for a deeper and more sensual feeling, which I adored.

The plus and minus buttons allowed me to control the intensity: I started with what I called the "foreplay setting" which was less intense, and worked my way up in intensity, finishing off with the Climax Control setting that combines suction with different pulsation depths.

The waterproof toy also performed beautifully underwater with a swirly sensation that was completely different (but equally enjoyable) to using it in bed.

If you find that most clit suckers are not size inclusive to your body, the Womanizer Next is a fantastic option due to the extra head. If you want a lot of bells and whistles, this device has 14 intensity levels and up to 42 combination options with additional innovative features. The 240-minute runtime is superior to other clitoral stimulators, reducing the need for frequent charging. If privacy and a discreet sound are priorities for you, it's the perfect toy.

Finally, it's ideal for those who don't love the oral sex experience, whether due to performance anxiety, specific preferences, or sensory issues. That said, it's not great for someone who prefers broad stimulation and vibrations on the labia and entire vulva: while the stimulation isn't direct, it is pinpointed on the clit.

The Next does come with a hefty price tag. So, if you're just starting out and want to try a less high-end clitoral stimulator, or can climax from a range of stimulation, a cheaper, no-frills option could work. But remember, you get what you pay for. If you're like me and have specific preferences — or just need to get out of your head during oral — this could be the upgrade to your orgasm routine that you've been desperately waiting for.

The Womanizer Next is made of 100-percent body-safe silicone and is available in sage, dark purple, or black. It is USB-rechargeable and use time can last up to 240 minutes before needing to be recharged.

The Womanizer Next also comes with multiple interchangeable head sizes, allowing users to find a better fit.

The Womanizer Next Clitoral Stimulator ($219) is available in three different colors from Amazon and Good Vibes, as well as Babeland.

★★★★

Naima Karp is a sexual wellness and lifestyle writer with more than a decade of experience. She prides herself on writing empowering articles that promote inclusivity and awareness for readers, presented through a unique lens. In addition to POPSUGAR, Naima has written freelance content for digital publications like Spy, Well+Good, and Variety.